Sunday, April 7, 2019

EVERYDAY IS A STRUGGLE


Everyday is a battle between a trying-to-be-strong me vs full-of-negativity me. Everyday I search for motivation within me, to get up and start my day. Everyday I wish I could turn back the old me, a cheerful and stronger version of me, a high performer me. Everyday I feel disappointed on how thoughts are running thru my mind, how I evaluate myself and how I respond with the things happening around me. Everyday is a constant reminder that I am at my lowest, that failure has kicked in, starting to eat and dominate my life. Yes, everyday I overthink things. And overthinking kills.

Everyday I question myself, “When this will end? When will I get better? Why am I suddenly a POORformer? Why can’t I cope with the demands of my work? Why am I always doubting myself? How to trust myself again? How to regain myself?”

As these negative bubbles are popping on my mind, still, there’s a small voice of hope reaching me.

Everyday I receive love. Everyday I have family and friends who are not getting tired of listening to my redundant rants and stories. Everyday there are people who cares about me. Everyday there are these people who finds time and effort to pop a single message asking how am I doing. Everyday there are people who reminds me that I can still get up and rebuild my life. Lastly, everyday the Holy Spirit gives me strength to push thru and get thru life’s obstacles.

Everyday is tiring. But these people are not getting tired of me. So who I am to give up? Still, everyday is a blessing. I am clinging to this hope that things will get better. Life continues..

Florina Cabrera
cabreraflorina.blogspot.com
ios.florinac@gmail.com

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